Add 1/8 cup of pet shampoo to the water in the bowl.
Pick up and soothe the cat while you carry him (or her) to the bathroom.
In one smooth motion put the cat in the toilet and close the lids. Note: You may need to stand on the lid.
At this point the cat will self-agitate and make ample suds. Note: Ignore the noises coming from the toilet as the cat is actually enjoying the bath.
Flush the toilet several times. (This will increase the effectiveness of the process and completely rinse the cat.)
Have another member of the household open the front door to your house. Note: Ensure that there are no people between the bathroom and the front door.
Stand away from the toilet and quickly lift the lid. Note: You may wish to stand in the tub or shower and use a stick or broom handle to lift the lid.
The cat will quickly exit the toilet and bathroom, sort of like 3:00 am behavior, and be out the front door before you can blink.
The cat will dry off and groom outside. Note: You may safely ignore the cat’s dirty looks as these will disappear the next time you use the can opener. Note 2: Both the cat and the toilet will be sparkling clean.